Feels normal, almost, which is a ridiculous thought because of their lives and Tony being, well, Tony. Yes, Tony, Bruce says in his indulgent and slightly patronising tone, and Clint has another giggle-fit into Nat's shoulder. What if she got kidnapped, a few months before Harry was born and the Potters got attacked on the faithful Halloween night? The Avengers and team red were play never have I ever but it was the drinking version. She is here to pick up Peter for their date that e seems to have not remembered." I don't know, I've hung out with Nat too much.". And Nat calls Clint the happy drunk, hah. Steve and Bucky were able to fully participate thanks to Thors gift of several casks of Asgardian mead- though he was in New Asgard at present. But you can say something you have done like, 'never have I ever eaten a cheeseburger' it just means that you have to drink, like everyone else who has done that particular thing.. I thought it was just a month and three weeks., Nope, she says and somehow manages to get behind the Captain, driving him to the floor with a well-aimed kick to the back of his knees. He was technically not lying, right? You learn stuff about each other.. Spill." All of the adults take a shot. That's a thing becoming more and more frequent, actually; the kissing. Seriously? "Because we're like siblings and always want to remember that," Ava says and we drop our shirts back down. Really?. Clint blinks and looks at the ceiling, but the AI stays silent. Blanket excuse.. left kudos on this work! Well, there you go. Tony's fingers trace a scar on Clint's lower back; stray bullet, Prague. Clint quashes that voice so hard it groans in metaphorical pain and leaves him alone. Bruce is still quiet, but he does have a cognac glass in his hands when he sits down beside Steve, a glass containing what looks like Bailey's, or some other kind of creamy liquor. Haaah, he says into her shoulder, curled up close to her side, with an arm resting on her waist. Before sex, during, after. Ned shook his head, as if to say; 'No, don't do this, jeez Pete! There they used the Reality Stone to change one little detail. Clint wonders if Tony and Bruce slept together. "Who are you and how did you get past FRIDAY?" Score one for Stark!. He looks up at the clock. He's also not going to reflect on where Tony has learned about shipping. Clint knows he's feeling his pulse. Pepper would tell you to run in the other direction and the thing is, the thing is, Barton Clint that I don't want you to. He blinks owlishly at Clint and sways a little. I may be putting a few not field trip one shots because I feel like it but most will be field trip. Random people in classrooms Tony, stop being judgemental. Two months, just about, Natasha says and twists to jab an elbow in Steve's side before ducking to avoid a fist in the face. Do you mind if I you don't have to answer if this makes you uncomfortable. He waits until Steve's looking at him. While we've done our best to make the core functionality of this site accessible without javascript, it will work better with it enabled. "Peter! So if you don't mind?, It takes a couple of seconds before Clint gets the implications so get the hell outta my room and when he does, he whines. Right! Tony makes a small, disgruntled noise and rubs his face, except he miscalculates the motion and it turns into more of a slap that swipes across his cheek and into his ear. In the end, he poured out a shot of apple juice and handed it to the pouting teenager. Like you and Steve aren't the exact same. Thirteen-year-old Natalie Pierce--aka Agent Sola--is no stranger to tough times. The room was silent for a moment and few flinched when Tony flipped the coffee table. i should continue that, and because i have writer's block and felt a moment of motivation, Paxton Hall-Yoshida/Ben Gross/Devi Vishwakumar, my benvi bias made itself known in the writing of this, but my love for every dynamic in the love triangle also made itself known, (if you consider canon proceeded as usual from 3.04 when reading this), never have i everplayed never have i ever. Who made you talk? Clint asks, because Tony is drunk all the time and he's never awkwardly confessed his feelings or anything before, which Clint will get right on having conflicted thoughts about that in a second, he just needs to finish up here first. Given the fact that they were all heroes and grown-up's or teens, the questions were going to be odd but I never thought it would be this odd. Natasha's smirking, but there's no edge to it, and Steve's eyes are brighter than they've been most of the night. Because because the strings! Come oooon, he says now, and waggles his eyebrows in a seductive way that is about as sexy as the thought of Fury wearing a banana hammock. Tony remembered Peter telling him about the new kid at his school and how he had gushed about how cool the guy was, almost certain he had gotten the name right. Never have I ever been on top of the Chrysler Building, Steve says. So no grabbing there, then, Tony says and trails his fingers over Clint's throat. 'Cause I'm open for a lot of stuff, man, but choking me's not gonna work out for everybody., Tony laughs, but it's soft, not mocking. Tony squirms on the couch, but keeps a small distance. 'Unreasonable asshole' is kind of my personality description. He frowns. Awesome! Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Michelle Jones & Ned Leeds & Peter Parker, Peter Parker & Academic Decathlon Team (Spider-Man: Homecoming), Michelle Jones & Ned Leeds & Peter Parker & Academic Decathlon Team (Spider-Man: Homecoming), Academic Decathlon Team (Spider-Man: Homecoming), Michelle and Peter are both obnoxious to their Feelings. Ben and Devi, the morning after their first boink. He's toppy as hell, no matter if he's giving or receiving, but he's adamant that Clint get as many orgasms as himself, and he's really good with some of the triggers Clint has. I'm gonna be down in the workshop for a while. And you wonder why people ship you two?. Natasha pets him on the head when Clint makes a vague noise that says he's less than thrilled with her meddling. And then adds, as an afterthought, pre-serum, by the way. Peter and Natasha were the only ones to drink. "Never have I ever smoked marijuana," Danny says and everyone but him takes a drink and this seems to surprisethe senior team. When he does, Tony sleeps beside him. #scarletwitch Was it Bucky Barnes? In these Au's Loki is an avenger because I like that idea and him dying isn't an option whatsoever. Shuri To absolutely no one's surprise, Tony's really good in bed. JARVIS won't be there to pick you up if you start choking on your own vomit.. But it still made him feel uncomfortable, in a foreboding way that he really didnt like. Clint buries the urge to giggle, because whose idea was this, anyway? Never have I ever taken it up the ass. And he grins, all teeth and glee, as the rest of the team groan in exasperation. It's all fun and games until someone loses an eye, though, which is why Clint doesn't like playing it. Nalinis words wont get out of Devis head so Ben gives her something else to think about. It was easy. Tony shrugs like it was nothing, his smirk just shy of a full-on shark grin. The elevator dinged. Before Tony can open his mouth to reveal his secret, Natasha sighs. Tony placed his drink on the side, Natasha automatically leaning over to fill it. You bribed him, didn't you? She sounds disappointed, as if she'd hoped for something less obvious. Tony?. Clint snorts. "This was very educational with Peter putting a chicken and flower pot on his head and getting a tattoo but it's three in the morning and we are all almost asleep," Uncle Steve says and I see he is right. And Bruce?. We never actually dated, did we? Tony asks out of the blue and scrunches his nose. Don't ask.. But Steve smiles and nods, still looking sad but not too much. For one thing, that'd be pretty sucky of me. Tony Stark/ Iron Man. And how you've managed to get him onto your side in nearly every single dispute since., Tony tries to look hurt, although he's doing a shit job at it, one hand dramatically resting against his chest in a who, me? Tony, Rhodey, Steve, Bucky, Clint, Natasha, and Peter all drank. You were doing so well. He's on his third glass by now, and most of them are getting foggy. Bi-curious, Peter shrugged, giving Tony a high five when he raised his hand. Danny, Luke, Ava, Nova, Aunt Nat, Mom, Dad, Uncle Clint, Uncle Thor, Uncle Sam, Uncle Rohdey, Uncle Bucky, Uncle Steve, Uncle Bruce, Uncle Loki, Wanda, Vision, Scott, T'challa, Shuri, and Aunt May. Lifted Mjlnir" Wanda said. (Blame his spider-side). Everything was going great until Y/n accidentally slaughtered her entire family with powers she didn't know she had. What Clint doesn't expect is for Thor and Bruce to drink; the first with his usual vigor, the latter with his eyes on the floor and color high in his cheeks. Wait, Flash? It's not needed; the genius does a fucking smashing job by himself, and Clint can't be bothered to give any shits. Thats messed up man. Sam shook his head. That's what Clint's picked up, at least, never actually having gone himself. Worst idea ever, woke up on the ceiling with no memory of how I got there or how I was covered in glitter," I say and everyone nods. Peter was happy when he learned that Jessica was discharged, and that she moved in with her new family. A small, annoying part of him wonders if Tony's actually been personally acquainted with Captain America's dick and adds that if Clint wants to find out, this would be the perfect opportunity. Plus, you know, Clint has done a lot of stuff. #peterparker Of course we do, Clint says and grins. Yeah, let's not, Clint murmurs back and doesn't miss the way Tony's smile widens. Tony is a terrible influence on everything ever. They always did one dumb ass thing for his birthday each year. Remember the toast?, Ouff! Steve goes to the floor, but turns around immediately, just as Natasha tries to knee him in the back. Clint doesn't avoid Tony. Here's nice. Oh, come on! She hasn't bothered with a glass. Parker, you're in charge. Did we have make-up sex?. Which I'm gonna lie in, whether you're in it or not.. Wouldn't you like to know? Clint says easily and takes another swig of Tony's Jim Beam. ", "He's not evil, Mr Stark, and he's only two years older than me," Peter pouted again "Can we just move on? "Never have I ever shot a gun," Scott says and everyone but Aunt May and he takes a drink. Tony brightens considerably at that. One beat. It's a great warrior-thing compliment up there, trust me. Peter said. He's honest-to-god pulled out a huge array of soft, big, fluffy pillows so they can all settle there. Guess we gotta call it off, then, Clint bullshits, and notes how he's started to wake up in certain parts of his body as well. "Excuse me" Natasha said. Because I do. AU: Devi and Paxton never broke up, and Devi and Des are just friends. There's nothing bad or wrong about it, Steve, Bruce says, ever the reasonable parent of them (when he's not giant and green, that is). Like you really thought it wasn't going to happen at some point. Clint rolls over onto his other side, so he faces away from Stark he doesn't like people staring at his face in his sleep. Not that fond of the taste, to be fair, but it'll do nicely. He's certainly grown on everyone else who lives in this tower even Steve's stopped looking at Tony like a secondary version of his dad, and started smiling at the guy more. Better known as MJ. Good. Damn. "Really?" Paxton dealing with the break-up in season 3. It was a stray knife, and he had to dodge bullets and make sure the woman was shielded from harm. Clint never liked those, more one for sharp, searing taste than soft sweetness himself (and wow, isn't that a metaphor for his life). Hope you enjoy and none of the art which I use here belongs to me, so credits to the respective artists or uploaders :). He's clearly forgotten where it is, so the chances are big that he'll jump someone else unsuspecting. Bruce was on a stool, placing the book he had been reading on the table next to the drinks when the others started talking, and Thor (who sat on a stool he had pulled away from the bar) decided to put his hammer on it. Because it's better than watching you run. He sighs. Tony could of sworn he had seen Bruce mouth 'Sugar Daddy', but that couldn't be right. So when Stark Industries called her, desperate for a housekeeper, there was no way in heaven she was gonna refuse. "More like each other, I made the mistake of looking into their car when they were waiting for me one time." tip: buffy gen teen AND "no archive warnings apply". I'm in a tzatziki mood. All of this comes out on one, long breath, and halfway through, Tony pulls out one of his tablets and starts plotting in a search for nearby Greek restaurants. Then he revisits that thought and realizes what word he just used. Everyone's got drinks, phones are off, all's well? Tony peers around, jittery with excitement again. #peterparker There's one problem. 'lfway into the Pern bottle? Tony offers. I am. Then he looks contemplative. Huh. Tony frowns and kisses Clint, cautiously, like he's checking something. Honestly of all the IronDad stories, this one is by far the best written, and quite possibly has the best finale I've seen in fanfiction ever. Tony blinks, surprised, and his hands still in Clint's cropped hair. permission from the author is required to publish them elsewhere. Edward had many regrets in life, ones that he probably would never get to remediate forbecause death made a sudden but wild appearance in his life, or so he thought, at least. Why wouldn't you?, I don't know, Clint says and leans forward until their foreheads touch. She also knows that Clint maybe, possibly, might have this thing where if he doesn't get cuddled he'll feel rejected and go from happy drunk to wistful drunk. Peter, Tony, Bucky, and Natasha all drank. Of course I am, just gimme, he whines and tugs at Clint's sleeve. Alright, Tony said, because of course he would take charge of anything alcohol related, everyone have a drink? Ouch, back to last names again. I saw it on F.R.I.E.N.D's and wanted to know what it was like!" You're an Asgardian. As Clint understands, the game's usually a ploy to get laid anyway, which makes him wonder why Tony wants to play it so badly. I have not encountered it before., Well, that's my new nickname for you, Tony says with a wide grin. Clint rolls his eyes and tugs Tony's shirt off. #nickfury Which means he usually ends up getting way drunker than the rest, and with two superhumans, a demi-god, a borderline alcoholic and a Russian as his competitors, Clint is screwed before the questions even start. He curls around Clint, who goes mellow at once. And the best. Peter staired Stark directly in the eyes, slowly raising his glass and finished his drink, keeping a blank the entire time. MJ said, her voice unlike he had ever heard, soft and worried and a bit amazed. While we've done our best to make the core functionality of this site accessible without javascript, it will work better with it enabled. Yeah, oh, Tony snipes. Plus, the whole team probably wants to know whether Steve's actually a virgin or not. Clint totally called it. Okay. ! and feels metal beneath one of his hands instead of flesh, that Clint lets his instinct take the backseat in order for his logic to come through. He's not sure if it's a warning sign or a sign of affection, but he flops onto his stomach anyway so he faces the circle. He's adorable, Tony drawls, a noticeable slur in his words by now, and Thor laughs, because he's laughing at pretty much anything at this point. Right! Back the fuck up." That's actually uh, weirdly flattering.. Did we make up? Tony asks, his whole face scrunched up in confusion and an attempt to remember yesterday. Tony makes a 'pssh' noise and pokes around in the fridge for one of his disgusting shakes. They're lying in bed, embracing, making out, and it's probably one of the gayer things Clint has done but he doesn't mind. Because Tony has stayed in his own bed this week, when he hasn't just camped out in his workshop (which are most days, from what Clint can see). She waved at them. Everyone was either leaning back into their chair or into the people next to them. Stopping now., Clint doesn't know if Tony means that he'll stop talking or stop running, but the guy trails off, so Clint gets a part-answer. Wha- Clint? Steve squeaks, like he thinks Clint will assault him or something. Like any of them would. But you do care deeply for each other, Thor says and sounds vaguely approving? WHAT HAPPENS WHEN A MURDER VICTIM TURNS UP ON YOUR DOOR? Yeah, you're doing a bang-up job, Tony., Aaaand we're back on first-name basis! Tony says and does an actual fucking fist-punch in the air. Nazi, Steve says. Guardians: What if Harry Potter had a big sister? The hottest boy in school. So why can't he get Eleanor's words from the winter dance out of his head? Nine pair of eyes looked at him. Then you get to be the one to tell everyone why we're not fucking each other.. 2. Okay, so this is just a book of MCU (mostly Peter Parker centric) one shots with tropes you've read a thousand times. You really were serious when you labeled Clint an affectionate drunk, weren't you? Bruce says to Natasha, and Clint giggles. "Peter BenjaminParker-Stark! I wouldn't fuck off if you were interested in more than just casual hook-ups, I mean., Tony leans into the touch, barely, but his eyes don't stray from Clint's. "What! It's my bed. All I asked was that you're honest with me whether it's about us being in a relationship or fuckbuddies or something completely different. Good morning, Miss Romanoff! Tony doesn't walk into the kitchen. Oh my god I cant believe I didnt think of that, Tony looked amazed at the gap in his thinking. That's pretty much it. He thinks for a moment. Wade explained. #natasharomanoff So we going for it, then? Clint asks, feeling way too hopeful. C'mon., Tony looks up and doesn't pull back, which means he's close enough that Clint could count his eyelashes if he wanted to. Clint and Natasha drink, and Clint's a little confused until he sees that both Cap and Bruce have relaxed a fraction, their smiles looser when they each raise their drinks. The silence prompts Clint to pry open his eyes. As expected, Natasha, Clint, Steve, Bucky, Sam and Tony drank, but yet again Peter surprised them all by downing his glass. Any trade marks that appear on the site are used without permission and Welp, I'm back from the second week of the holiday-thingy. Clint hears someone enter the room, and is awake before said person has the time to get over to the bed. Its a honest to goodness benvi modern shakespeare au without the random plotting cousin. Please don't ask Pepper., Clint doesn't bite down on his laugh this time. Never have I ever repurposed a common household item into a sex toy, then needed medical assistance because I had a foreign object stuck inside me, Tony cried. Oh, sh- Tony! Immediately he releases the genius, who groans in pain and rolls his shoulder. That was really nice., I know, Clint says and doesn't so much sit down as he falls on his ass. (he was the youngest, and fortunately for him, only had one drink). Work Search: Oh fuck you honey bear, that was a targeted attack!. Clint actually has respect for that manipulation strategy although that doesn't mean he approves of it being used on him. Am I correct in that deduction? Vision asked. Tony purses his lips. The thing is, Tony says when Clint walks out of his apartment the same night. We gotta have that rule. A sex ally! He squirms happily where he sits and knocks his elbow against Clint's in what's probably supposed to be a companionable gesture. Really? Steve says, barely winded, kicking Natasha in the stomach, but she twists enough that it barely grazes her. I just I guess it comes down to the person, and not their equipment? The last part sounds like a question, one of his 'is this something that makes sense in this century' ones. Same as Steve- dirt poor in the 30s, was all Bucky said. Told in two timelines, this is a story of finding both a father and a new home. Not more running, at least, which I totally admit, I did most of the running, but yeah. How will she react? Write by: . I'd love to stay and chat. This one counts.". Ever wondered what the Avengers or the characters of the Marvel Cinematic Universe would be as yanderes? , The spider bite enhanced everything- strength, metabolism, healing, sex drive.. "Never ever have I worn a chicken on my head," Aunt Nat says and I take a drink and yet again I'm the only one. He ignores the sulking genius and watches Lindsay decide on a red velvet. They just lie there, entangled, and slowly drift off. Michelle was even prepared to get the bells from her own room. Yes? Devi's life is turned upside down after a night at a party. So, Captain America's gay, Tony says into his VSOP. Vague snorts from the rest of the team. He sleeps around a lot. Peter didn't know how to respond, the sudden worry etched in MJ's voice throwing him off. Yeah?. And don't use the classified information clause to chicken out when the questions start to get interesting. Tony glares at each and every one in turn, except for Thor, because TMI has always been a bigger problem than the opposite when it comes to him. What starts out a little desperate turns languid, relaxed, comfortable. Never have I ever been in more than a hundred countries. He takes a sip of Bailey's, and Clint, Natasha and Tony follow his lead. He had changed out of his suit into a baggy jumper May given him for his birthday, joggers and random socks that had been on the floor of his bedroom. #fieldtrip Clint isn't exactly the once-a-year kind of guy himself, but he's pretty sure that Tony's number counts double of his own. A shit-eating grin covered his face. Then Peter took a shot. It's strangely nice. After another round of raucous laughter, Peter pulled himself together enough to keep the game going. Natasha huffs a laugh and pulls back. Natasha had her own seat, Clint sitting on the back while cleaning a few of his arrows from his quiver, and was sat sideways across it with her legs hanging over the armrest. I Dare you to say the Truth. Steve Rogers/ Captain America By the time it got to Sam, he decided to tease Steve and Bucky a little more by saying "Never have I ever had a boyfriend.". He hadn't expected Peter to take another drink, however, in fact no one had. 's been an awes'me night. He grimaces. "Nope, he's straight and started dating Cassidy from maths. Aunt May says and I shrug. It's entertaining, if not hell on the ear drums. This is a game, but we can't break the rules.. Nat and Wanda took drinks. I believe it would be best if we stopped the game now as it seems to be somewhat awkward. Clint was just glad he had been filming it all on his phone ever since Peter admitted to having a boyfriend. 25 Feb/23. ", No one complained, if they said she couldn't pass then they'd be there all year. Oh FUCK YOU MAXIMOFF! Tony shrieked while the others howled with laughter; even Vision smiled reservedly. He stumbles forward and into Clint, scrabbling to get the phone back. "Never ever have I gotten shot," Aunt May says and everyone but her, Shuri, T'chall, and Scott takes a drink. "Ouch" she groaned quietly into her pregnancy pillow, trying not to wake Paxton and reach towards the night stand to grab her phone and check the time 4:45 A.M.